Warts and all….

Some times I feel like this gourd.  Well, lots of times.  On first impression the gourd is warty, funky colored, not ideal.  I feel like that, too.  Seems I have always been the ugly friend, the “wingman” , the less refined, the socially inept, the chubby one, the one that had a lot of dreams but fears got in the way.  The B+, not the A.  The too needy, like a dog begging for attention or a child wishing for affirmation.  Yes, this is what I think about in the shower, during yoga, while laying in bed at night, while driving my car, while doing things with my kids-I am just not good enough.  But, this gourd is.  He, I will assume “he” as it is sexless, grows from a vine, and when complete, he is cut and sold.  As is, for seasonal decoration, then discarded.   On the brighter side of this, I took the picture because I liked his warts, his coloring, his overall funkiness.  I’m not sure, but I will venture someone else does too.

 

It was recently said, that in order to shine a light into the world, you have to start by shining a light in yourself.  So, do not think I am some self loathing individual,  I am just shedding some light inside to the corners and finding things that have been living there.  They seem to be blocking some major arteries of life for me and I just need to figure out how to flush the system clean.

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